Generation Hex

True story… just the other day. I go into one of my all-time favorite off-price stores and there’s a sale going on (isn’t there always). So I Grab a tee-shirt- marked down… still too much, but its designer, kinda fly— what the hell. I’m late on a gift I’d been looking for since the first of June… on sale- scoop. Pair of linen slacks- sale… yank’em- spank’em. And finally, one silk short-sleeve summer shirt, 25% off, off the rack and off I go… to the register.

Now to tell the story correctly, I need to interject here that the gift is a shirt by a company that no doubt has secured the rights to produce under the name of Beetles great- John Lennon. Nice shirt… its cotton and colorful… not as substantial to the touch or in weight as say an Alan Flusser or a Robert Graham and truth be told, probably more correctly priced at this now sale price,  but it is John Lennon and its kinda funky, in a 60’s kinda way, and so it’s a go fa-sho.

Now as I’m standing in line behind two ladies, both of whom have way too much stuff and I’m thinking to myself- “I sho wish these little ‘blue-hairs’ would put some of that shit down”… to speed things up a bit. They couldn’t possibly NEED all the junk they had and I’m on my lunch-break and hadn’t even gotten anything to eat yet. But then they opened another register and so now, problem solved. And I felt a little guilty about only thinking about what was best for me in that moment. Which also brings me to an old George Carlin quote. After Richard Pryor, George Carlin may very well have been the funniest guy I ever heard, and he used to say “ever notice how all your shit is ‘stuff’, and everybody else’s stuff  is shit?” Anyway, I digress… so I’m standing there and I’m whiling-away the time on my cell-phone as I wait my turn, only looking up as the lady in front of me moves forward.  And by the time I get to the register I still wasn’t really paying as close attention as I might have otherwise. So I lay my items on the counter and as the young lady at the register starts to scan them she goes “ oh I like these…” and I’m like, finally raising my head, “oh…?” and she further explains “these ‘linen’ slacks…”. Well I’m sorry, but a twist-on-words, be it a well-conceived one, or one just created by the moment, was too much for me to resist. So I’m like “yes… and you know what else is ‘Lennon’, (as I pick it up to show her) “ this shirt!” And she goes “nooo… that’s cotton”. Now this is getting too good… because now I turn the shirt so she can see the front where there is a small cardboard tag with a picture of John Lennon on it and I go “yes, but it's also Lennon”.  So now no doubt by this time she’s thinking “wish I’d never said anything to this idiot” as she goes, “no, it's 100% cotton… but we have been selling quite a few of them lately”. Well now I’m becoming just slightly annoyed at the fact that she hasn’t noticed that I was only trying to be cute, not crazy, as I lift up the cardboard photo of Lennon attached to the shirt showing it to her and go “yes I know… you know… Lennon…?” And she looks at me… and there is this look on her face… and for the first time I really focus in on what I’m dealing with here… a Millennial! This girl is maybe 24-25 years old so she doesn’t know who The HELL, John Lennon is! I’m telling you she don’t know John Lennon from Vladimir Lenin… or a Beetle from a Bolshevik! Seriously! She looks at me with these pretty little puppy eyes and she goes “so you recognize him, you know him…?” and I sigh and go on to explain that he was a key member of one of the most significant bands in the history of music, before going on to a very successful solo career, and was later shot and killed by a crazy bastard. And I suggest that she go to her favorite music-site and sample his work. Then as she finishes ringing me up, she asked if I thought she might like his music. To which I only responded “I Imagine…” and I stopped right there, picked up my purchase and walked out.


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| 598 views | July, 10th, 2017

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